Which Day Defines Your Year? A HaYom Challenge for the Yamim Noraim

The theater has it right about the day. Whether it is Emily begging the stage manager to return to Grover’s Corners for one more day in Our Town, Billy getting one more day to visit his daughter Louise in Carousel or Mark in Rent talking about “single frames of one magic night forever flicker(ing) in close-up,” it is often one or two moments, one or two days in a year, a Yom, that teach us most about ourselves and what matters.

At Elli Kranzler’s annual slichot concert last night into this morning, the sole thread (and the soul thread) that weaved through his music and tefila was the day of his mother’s death this summer.  While every year’s concert is incredible, it was this one that stood out—as his words, his voice and his music, his lens on the slichot was shaped by one day where he lost his mother, his teacher and his nurturer.  As one who was blessed to be there last night, I would say that it was his Yom.

As I enter into this year, I reflect on many blessed days of filled with s’machot and special blessing.  But truthfully, the day that defined my year was Friday, March 23.  It was on that day when I had an accident that landed me in the hospital. Shabbat HaGadol 5778 was spent in MRI’s, EKG’s and dizzy spells, not my usual pre-Pesach annual learning with my rebbes Hain and Exler.  

It was on that day, when I internalized the fragility of life and God’s gifts in a new way. It was on that day when I saw in clear focus the love and care from my wife—my caregiver in every way, the immense support from my brother who sat with me in the hospital, the loving concern from my children, parents and sister who all helped nurse me to health and the countless visits and calls my neighbors, friends and family near and far who brought food and love for the weeks after my accident. That day has shaped my year in a way I could never have expected. That is my Yom from this year.

The word HaYom leads into the High Holidays in a way few words do. Last week’s parsha Ki Tavo and this week’s Nitzavim all contain the words of Devarim 29 as the Jews are on the cusp of Eretz Yisrael. It is in this chapter were we are told that הַיּוֹם that this day, we will have a deeper heart and new vision (29:3). It is in this chapter where we are told that it is הַיּוֹם on this day where we stand before Hashem (29:9). And it is in this chapter where we are told that it is on this day הַיּוֹם where our relationship with God is established (29:11).

And we will all sing powerfully the prayer at the end of each day of the Yamim Noraim, asking Hashem on this day, הַיּוֹם to strengthen us - תְּאַמְּצֵֽנוּ - to bless us - תְּבָרְכֵֽנוּ - and raise us up - תְּגַדְּלֵֽנוּ. It is the Yoms that define us and, if internalized, lead us toward living the lessons of goodness.

Not every one of us has a Yom every year, but often we do.  So this Yamim Noraim, maybe take a moment to think of your Yom. What was it about that day and that experience that made you see clearer, make you better, make you different or challenge you in a new way?

Share that day with friends and family (and maybe even on social media #hayomchallenge) as a window into your soul to connect with others and to God. Take a HaYom challenge and let it challenge you and those around you to be their best selves in the coming year.

Shana Tova.